Enjoying the Journey of Parenthood: Accountability

Being a Momma

Being A Mom is the most important job you will ever do. A day’s work in the life of a mom cannot be measured by stacks of paper, trophies won or products sold. At the end of each day, you find that there are still dirty diapers to be changed, mouths to feed and floors to clean. However, in between all these tasks that seem, at times, to be mundane, there is an incredible sense of joy that accompanies motherhood. Join with us, as we take pride and pleasure in the simple smile of a child. From entertaining, to strictly applying discipline, we would like to walk with you through this journey, in hopes of offering some ideas, tips, hope... and maybe even a giggle or two.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Accountability

A little game we play at our house is Good choice/ Bad choice. Some times when we are eating dinner or riding in the car I give the kids a scenario like....is it a good choice or a bad choice to hit your brother...then they say "Bad choice". Then, "Is it a good choice or bad choice to tell your Dad 'I love you'."I give them like 10 or so at a time, some good and some bad. They have hardly ever answered wrong. Children know what is right and wrong, most of the time. Teaching them accountability is where the test comes in. So then we have a real situation, say one of my girl's steals a toy from the other. I whip out my good choice/bad choice. I say something like, "Is it a good choice or a bad choice to take toys from some one else?" Most of the time I get a brief, "Bad choice." Then I say, "So what would be a good choice?" Then she has to go through a list of other things that would be good choices like: "ask her if I can use it when she is done" or "ask her if she wants to switch me for the toy that I had". It works well to help them internalize the choice that they made and then think about the better alternatives to that choice.

Also if the answer ever turns to, "Well she made me mad" or "She did this...so I did this" I remind them that it is their choice to be mad or to lash out, no one can make us do anything. We still have the choice on how we react. To act for yourself has become a rare virtue in our society. Act not react.

What are some ideas you use to teach kids accountability?

2 comments:

Randi said...: My kids at school are a bit older so I use something that asks them to identify the mistake they are making. When they are doing something that they shouldn't, I look at them and say "can you solve that problem" They then know that they are doing something they shouldn't and they can think of a better solution. They appreciate it because I am not voicing their mistake foe all to hear. They can solve it themselves.; October 2, 2008 at 7:09 PM
Alicia Steere said...: I like this idea...I am going to start doing this with Shelby!!! Thanks for the tips, and by the way, I love this blog! You are so creative! :); October 3, 2008 at 9:17 AM

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Ashlee

I love being a Mom more than anything. I have four beautiful children (twins who are 5 and a three year old and a new born baby) who love to do new things. I love watching them grow and learn. I am so blessed to be able to stay home and be with them every day. I started this blog when I lost a very close family member and friend. She was about as devoted a Mom as I had ever seen. She didn't let one smile go by without being there. But despite her great love for her children she developed a very severe postpartum depression that spiraled out of control. She took her own life as a result. One thing she said to me just a few months before she died was that she didn’t know how to stay home with her kids. Being a Mom doesn't always mean trips to the zoo and lunch dates with friends. In a society on the go, becoming a mom is a big jump for many women. Without knowledge and resources, being at home can feel overwhelming and kind of scary. Sitting at her funeral and watching her family, now without a Mom, I started to think about all the mothers in this world who suffer from similar feelings towards their own callings as mothers. Depression comes for many reasons and in many forms. Many Mom's in our society suffer from postpartum depression and other forms of depression, and without proper help they too can lose sight of their love for their children and the reality of their lives. No matter who you are or what you are going through there is joy to be found. It starts with the little things. This blog is dedicated in memory of my dear friend to all Moms. May we make a difference in this world by cherishing our great calling of parenthood.

Our Goal

It is our goal here to empower women, and men, in their journey of parenthood. We want to give you the resources to teach your children, to strengthen your relationships, to get organized, to optimize health, and to find the joy that can be yours. We want to give you ideas that make you want to stay home and teach your children and to get excited about slowing down and enjoying your days alone with your kids. Parenthood can be the greatest calling we ever receive on this earth. With the right tools, we believe that you can cut back on tantrums and miscommunications with your children. Ultimately in teaching them to be independent human beings, you will show them how to respect those around them and become adults that you can be proud of. Having resources to teach your children and gear their energy in positive directions can change the way that they behave and treat others, and ultimately change the way that you look at parenthood.

Please take anything or all that you read on this blog and make it your own. Take time to enjoy the little moments with your children. Love them. Give them the confidence to make their generation even better than ours has been. What we give them is the foundation they will have for the rest of their lives. That is the gift that only you as parent can give them. Slow down and keep it simple. And remember you are not alone. There are so many around you who are going through all of this too. Create friendships with other parents. Create these friendships on the positive reasons that you are parents. And Please, if you feel that you are suffering from any type or degree of depression, ask for help. There is nothing to be ashamed of. There are many resources all around that can help you through. Your family and friends can be there for you, so tell them how you feel.

Thank you again for your ideas and support in spreading joy to all parents. Enjoy the Journey, the journey of Parenthood.